Self control and Yoga

Self control is something that everyone has to learn.  For children, this is a skill that can take some time.
Self control is being able to control how you act in response to a situation instead of relying on impulses.  As kids get older, they become better able to understand the cause and effect of their actions, and develop the self control needed to have socially acceptable behavior.  They start to make the connection that temper tantrums and negative behavior usually will not lead to a positive outcome.

Self control is needed not only to make being in mixed company more comfortable, but also for the safety of the child.  A young child without self control may be apt to run into the street after a beloved toy, or throw a temper tantrum in a crowded store when mom will not buy a new toy.  An older child without self control may be more easily pressured by peers to engage in dangerous behavior, such as using drugs or alcohol.

Of course, you cannot expect a two year old to have the same self control as a twelve year old.  Different ages have different abilities when it comes to self control.

Children under the age of two often become frustrated, since they are becoming more aware of their surroundings and things that they want to take part in, but are still not aware of their own limitations.  The best thing you can do is control your own reactions and be a model of self control.  Very young children can often be distracted from dangerous situations, and at the age of two a time out period of a few minutes can start to impose the negative outcomes of unwanted behavior.
From three to five, time outs can become longer.  In some cases, it may be most effective to end the time out as soon as your child has calmed down, since this will encourage self control.  If you see your child handling a difficult situation appropriately, remember to praise them.

Once a child starts going to school, they have a better grasp on the different consequences of negative behavior, as well as an elementary understanding that they have some control.  For some children, visualizing a stop sign or red light before proceeding with a given behavior can give them a chance to think about consequences.  Teaching your child to relax in stressful situations will also help with impulse control.

In their preteen years, children are able to analyze situations a lot better.  At this stage you can encourage them to think about the consequences of all of their actions.  In the teenage years, your child will have a pretty good grasp of self control.  However, even teenagers have a problem thinking about the long term consequences of actions.  Encouraging your child to talk through problems, as well as putting into place disciplinary measures, may help.

Yoga can be a great way to help children teach self control.  The different postures take some focus to learn, and the stress reducing techniques can help cool down a situation that has reached the boiling point.

Teaching your child some of the yoga skills of relaxation and breathing (such as imagining that they are in a comfortable, happy place and then counting to ten) can help them to gain enough self control that they can accurately assess the situation and the consequences of their responses to it.